The life of my little family

Kids... Damned if you do, damned if you dont. The last 48 hours have been somewhat of a rocky ride. Well, not just the last 48 hours... the last 2 years. I would have to say that one of the happiest days in my life was when i found out i was going to be a father. I could not believe how lucky i was. It was a true blessing after the week my partner and i had just had. Within 4 days, Nic's grandad died and then 4 days later my Nan passed away. then, on my birthday, Nic told me the good news. After a whole day of fighting coz i made too many phone calls... she told me i was going to be a dad.
Lets jump forward nine months to when Addison-dior was born. things went well with the birth and we thought we had a very big and healthy baby girl. about 10 days later... she spent 9 days in hospital again. The doctors had no idea what was wrong with her. they tried just about everything. 18 months on and i must say, i have the most beautiful, energetic and smart daughter who currently i am teaching to say "I Love You" just so i can hear her say the 3 most important words in the world. Her vocabulary is growing everyday. She just talks and talks now. But this brings me onto Phoenix. My poor little man smiled at me yesterday for the first time and it wasn't wind. Ask Nic...lol In the last 3 days we have had to do 2 wee samples and give blood twice and there not taking little amounts of blood... there taking ALOT. The doctors don't know whats wrong with him. All i know is that we have to wait 2 weeks for these test results and if they come back clear then they have to do a biopsy on his liver.  Good news today though. He is still really badly jaundiced and when tested on tuesday his levels were 120 (Meant to be 20) and today they had dropped to 100. So thats a start. Hopefully he is getting better. He has a hernia in his belly button as well. He hates nights. He is sleeping now but when he wakes up for his next feed i know he will be restless for quite some time unless he is held. Jett is handling things well. Man how much has he grown...lol I was talking to him about what he liked and how he was when i first met him and he remembers it all. I have soo many good memories of our time together and i could not imagine life without him in it. I think i got the best 2 for 1 deal EVER!!! Now its a 5 piece and its awesome.
All i have to remember, to get me through my day... Think of my 3 beautiful kids smiling.


Love you all.

Finney

Temptation Slaughter

Whats the purpose of this Slaugter,


open range, open wound.

I know that theres a meening,

to my thoughts, in my gloom.

Is there anything beyond this,

in my mind, i should see.

All the trouble that i'm causing,

This wont end, you and me.



There used to be no feelings,

in the words i would write.

At first in the begining,

I would try not to fight.

But it seems its getting easier,

To let go of how i feel.

With everyday beyond us,

everything becomes more real.



Im sitting here in silence,

as i swore i never would.

Questioning my own ability,

asking if i ever could.

Do you understand the real me,

is my point to you made clear.

If i could start again and change this,

I would take away our fear.



Copyright - Shane Finney 2008

I wrote this AGES ago and just found it again. Man i used to write some good shit. Tell me your thoughts.

My morning marathon...

Good morning all, how are we?
If you know where i live then you would know that its very hilly. This morning, i decided to take my daughter for a walk. I thought yeah... the shops aren't that bad, why not go down there. When your awake most of the night with a new born and you have other children that wake up early, most days its really hard to find the motivation needed to start the day. All i can say is Woah... a 2km walk up and down steep hills really did it for me this morning. Its something that both myself and my daughter enjoyed, She laughed as we went over the bumpy footpath and the scone that she got when we reached the bottom of the hill at the bakery. I dont think i would of been able to do that walk 2 months ago. I would of wanted a smoke just to get my breath back...lol So i am now a non smoker and am trying to get fit and all i can say is... Im loving it at the moment. Still things that have to change but hey, it wont happen overnight but it will happen.
Something else i am working on at the moment is The Point. Check it out at The Point Gold Coast.
Thats it from me for now... Speak soon.




Finney

My music page.

www.myspace.com/finneyhwy
Check it out. Its just some music i have done in my time


:)

The start of phase 2!!! What am i getting myself in to?

Why hello there followers and people who just click on my page randomly, how are we?
So i have forgotten how many weeks its been since i have quit smoking but i am sure we have passed the 2 month mark. Wow its been hard. Its amazing to think about how much can happen in 2 months.
On the 8th of April 2010 i became a parent again. At 9:50am, Phoenix Henry Arthur Finney was brought into the world by Sandy at the Tweed Hospital. It was a quick birth (As Always) but it wasn't that day that became the stressful one, It were the days to follow.
The days before Phoenix's birth, N and i spoke about what was to happen when the day finally arrived and we made a plan. My plan was to be on holidays and stay at home with the other kids for a few days while N was in hospital. This was great. Good plan...so we thought. My mum had agreed to come down and stay with me and the 2 little ones for a few days, just to help out around the house to make it easier on N when she got home but the thing is... N didn't come home, not for 8 days. Phoenix was suffering from severley jaundiced. Wow, talk about hard. It was rough on me at home and i can only imagine how hard it was for N in hospital. Hospital food and hospital beds. She even awoke one night to feed and on her way down to special care, slipped on one of each of her shoes. One thong and one slipper. Atleast she got the right feet. Between doing the kids runs to school and kindy, 2 trips a day to the hospital and then the witching hour i was challenged. This really tested me and i tell N that i give her all credit as this is what she does all day every day while im at work and i agree with you here... YES you do have the hardest job in the world...lol
Through all this, i stuck to my no smoking but i failed in another area. 2 things took a beating. 1 was my pocket and the other was my weight. It was quick, it was convenient so i spent the money and got the take away and i can tell you now that over that time i added about 5kg's to my weight. So this blog is to tell you what i plan to do.
I plan to loose weight. I have set a goal and a time frame of how long i have to do this.

My Starting Weight - 111.7kg's

My Goal Weight - 90kg's

So what do you think... Thats a total weight loss needed of 21.7kg's. Lets say, i want to achieve this in 3 months. Lets see how i go. I will update once a week with my weight but will blog throughout the weeks with how i am feeling and what i did to help achieve my weight.
New me... Here i come.

Till next time people,


Take it easy.


Finney

Holy cow, i made it a month!!!!

Well... i didn't think i'd be saying this anytime soon but...
I MADE IT A MONTH WITHOUT A CANCER STICK!!!!!
It feels weird. My clothes dont smell anymore, the taste in my mouth is not that of a filthy ashtray, My fingers dont smell and the list goes on. I will admit, i have but on a little weight since giving up smoking but thats something that over the coming days that i am preparing to loose which is something i will start blogging about too. I am talking about Body Trim. I tell you what, this is amazing stuff. My boss started this program about 4 weeks ago and i think he said he has lost about 8kg's. But you see, its weight thats going to stay off because of how the program works. If i didn't know anyone who was doing the program and someone told me i'd probably laugh at them and tell them... you cant eat more to loose less...lol
So here i am, 4 days before im 26, about to become a father again within the next few days and i am taking one the biggest challenges life has to offer... apart from children, Quitting smoking and of course, loosing weight. Its time to create a new me. The next blog will have my goals in it, my current weight and how i am going to go about loosing weight. Lets see if the next 3 weeks holidays i can turn my life around.
Enjoy life everyone...


Finney

Tomorrow see's me 2 weeks without a smoke

The hardest oart is over... The first 2 weeks. I know there are smokes around the house, hell... i even have a packet in the car. I cleaned out the ashtray the other day and i tell you what... the smell was disgusting. I am so glad i am not putting that bad shit into my mouth anymore. I do miss it sometimes though. I miss the feeling of sitting out side with a drink, puffing away. I dont miss it enough to take it back up though. I am getting more done at work too i feel because i am not spending 10 minutes every hour and a half having a smoke. My car is starting to smell better, i am starting to taste things more, i am starting to be able to be more active without getting puffed. I still have a huge hill to climb but i know that this time i start to climb that hill, theres no cloud of smoke in the way. Theres no heavy chest, no pounding heart... just me and my heart. I am gonna beat you smokes... beat you to a pulp!!!


Take it easy,




Finney

Its been... One week since you looked at me.

Well gooooood morning. What a fantastic feeling after having 8 hours sleep. Wow, thats a 3rd of my day gone already in just sleep. So lastnight i said to myself... IM going to start exercising. I said to Nic, Im gonna wake up at 6am and jump on the exercise bike. I dont think she believed me. I dont think i believed me. So, this morning, just to fool everyone INCLUDING myself, i gave it a go. I jumped on the bike and pedalled for 15 minutes. Thats good for me. A week off smoking, haven't exercised in years and i can manage to last 15 minutes without breaking a sweat barely... I am proud of myself. Small steps is all im going to take. I had a nice and healthy salad with dinner lastnight courtesy of the princess. Hope she makes something yummo for dinner tonight. So, in todays blog, i thought i might include some of my inspirations for quitting smoking. These 3 things mean the world to me even though one of them now is standing next to me smelling like a nappy has been dragged threw the sewer... the joys of wake up time.

Anyways, enjoy my inspiration and i hope you have enjoyed my post.

Take It Easy,

Finney!

OK sickness, enough is enough...

Back feeling like it just needs to be cracked constantly, bleeding nose, ulcers in my mouth, head aches, eyes sore... I have had enough. I should of just kept smoking. I felt better in the moment when i was smoking. My fuse is getting shorter again. Cant handle too much pressure atm. Just need rest but find everything is annoying me. Why tha fuck does it make you feel so shit...
And then i remember.
This is a 12 year habbit that im trying to kick. I have 12 years of toxins to release from my body. I need to focus on the later and not the now. Put all energy i have left on what is coming, not what is happening.
Focus...


Focus

Worst night ever.

Well... I am not enjoying the whole quitting smoking experience. Last night was probably the worst night of sleep i have ever had. The withdrawals have kicked in hard and i am suffering pretty bad. I feel bad because i am hopeless at the moment. I feel like i cant do anything. I went to the doctors yesterday and she told me i was burnt out. I have no reserves left. My tank is empty. That's exactly how i feel. I remember last time i tried to quit it was with Champix. It was working well but it made me cranky. Really really cranky and you ask Nic and she will tell you exactly that. It nearly ruined my relationship. Even though she was supporting me heaps, it felt as if it wasn't good enough. This time, I just feel empty. Like there is nothing inside but blank. I was having the weirdest dreams last night about parts for cars and i couldn't sleep until i had all these parts with what they needed to be with. I was awake about every hour and it was crap. The next few days are going to be spent resting. Must get as much rest as possible. I have a full packet of smokes here in the house but i don't know where Nic has put them. I guess with having them here its good because i know that if i want one, there here which kinda makes me want to quit more. If i had none here then i think i would break because i know I'd have to go and find one. Anyways, it makes sense in my head. Day 4 and no smoking... Its only the beginning but its a start :)

Take it easy,


Shane

The End... of day 1!!!!!

Hello there world of blogspot, how are we all?So i have lasted since 7:00pm last night without a smoke. I haven't really thought about it much today really. There was things i thought like Wow, I'd normally have a smoke when i did this or geeze i should of had a smoke on the way to work but hey... Its only a small step but i feel better already. I have been speaking to people and all they say is watch out... You'll put on weight. Im gonna have to control that aswell. So much to do. This is the 3rd attempt of quitting so i am hoping its 3rd time lucky...lol
Well... im about 4 weeks off being a dad again. Excited much... Cannot wait.

Anyway, Update more later.


Take it easy.


Shane

Because she said... Day 1!

So the title is relevent... I started this blog... Because she said i should start one to help with quitting smoking. So here is my goal first.
GOAL!!! To quit smoking within 3 months.
How am i going to do this... By Lozenges to start with.
Why am i quitting... Because i have a family i need to think about.

So Nic has just pointed out to me what i need to do. That is quit. So i have to take this one step at a time. I know when i smoke and i know why i smoke. I can even tell you when i started smoking. I was 14 and i was on Music camp at Ashmore Palms Resort with the Southern Stars Ensemble. I played the trombone... Insert laugh here. I thought i would be more accepted by everyone if i was a smoker... Like the cool kids. Was i wrong. I didn't know it would lead to years of being unhealthy, moody, borke... and the list goes on.

Last time i tried to quit i was on Champix. That name is a swear word in my household now... just ask Nicole. It made me angry, moody, depressed etc. and i just hated everyone. I NEED to do this for my family and my own health. I also a, a singer and i know that when i am off the darts, my voice is 100% better. Anyway, stay tuned on how my journey is going and tell me your weird and wacky tales of smoking.


Take it easy...


Finney