Song for Nicole

I'm still amazed by your beautiful face.
Your warming smile and the touch of your embrace.
But i'm still wondering,
Still Wondering
What i'd do if you weren't around.

I still feel alone whenever you're not here.
Your feelings known every day becoming more clear.
But then it leaves me wondering,
Always wondering
What i'd do if you weren't around.

I'm still crazy for
everything you've ever done for me.
The way you are
when no one else is around.
I'm always crazy for
the friend that you've become to me
You leave me waiting
Til my feet hit the ground.

You have a gift inside i've never had before.
You're giving me life now i could never ask for more
but hey you keep me wondering,
constantly wondering
What i'd do if you weren't around.

but i'm still crazy for
everything you've ever done for me.
The way you are when no one else is around.
I'm always crazy for
the friend that you've become to me
You leave me waiting
til my feet hit the ground.


Written 06/10/2008
Lyrics/poem property of Shane Michael Finney

Every Mothers Outrage (EMO)

Exclamation, defamation
on the face of 15 youths.
Your time has come and passed you,
now you're blinded by the truth.
A thousand fingers pointing
in the way of your direction.
Laughing now they'll heckle you
into a world of misconception.

Jumping through a rusty web,
of spiders snakes and nails
guiding you along the path
and nearly off the rails

Get off my back, you're useless,
all these voices in my head.
Your advice has shown me nothing
but to wish that i was dead.

Confrontation, damn youth nation,
Always drugging out your life.
The only choice that's let for you
is picking up your knife.
Your father said to get a job
and your mother told you to care.
Instead, you grew yourself a fringe
and put black colour in your hair.

Get off my back, you're useless,
All these voices in my head.
Your advice has shown me nothing,
but to wish that i was dead.


Written 15/12/2006
Lyrics/Poem is property Shane Michael Finney.

Average aussie dad - new words.

I’m getting tired for reasons I can’t seem to control,
I keep repeating all the same old miseries.
It seems my way of thinking is my biggest downfall.
We fall and get back up
But life just gets a kick from holding me.
I struggle daily with a past that I can’t run from.
This record player always jumps back to the same old place.
I’m feeling broken like my better years have passed me.
I’ve fallen, how the fuck
Do people manage to stay in the race?

Do I just keep on living
All the while dreaming?
I’m too scared I’ll get in the way.
But soon I’ll be over,
This moment, it’s over.
Watch as I’m fading away.

I’m taken back to when my life really had no one.
The only difference is the numbing of the pain.
Youth would see me drink the problems out of this one.
I’d fall and get back up
The sore head wasn’t all that would remain.

Do I just keep on living
All the while dreaming?
I’m too scared I’ll get in the way.
But soon I’ll be over,
This moment, it’s over.
Watch as I’m fading away.

Average Aussie Dad - The door

Have you ever reached for a door and gotten butterflies before touching the handle...

I have. G'day, how are you? Lets start by saying that as most of you may know, life has been pretty shit. It has been just over 2.5 years since separating from my wife and it has been a lonely 2.5 years. The main advice people give me is to stop looking... someone will come along when you least expect it. This is something i MUST remind myself everyday. I am not used to being alone... I haven't spent that much time alone since i was about 14 years old. So what do i do to pass my time alone... I cook and i just joined a gym. It MUST start at home. Happiness. If you're not happy then CHANGE. Thats what i need to do. 4 days a week i am committing to at the Gym and i am currently planning my meals out to fit to a Keto/Paleo style diet. If you have ANY tips then please feel free to leave a comment or shoot me an e-mail.

Recently i started a new job with a local business which focusses on family owned small business. i LOVE it. I am only a month in and i hope for success with it. Like everything, you only get out what you put in so its time to step it up and give it my all.

In the coming days... or maybe even tonight... I will sit down and fill you in on how the kids are going. That is a whole new blog on its own.

Until then, take care of yourselves.

Finney

That moment you realise...

You are alone.

Sorry

I'm sorry. Sorry for turning our home into just yours.  I'm sorry for not giving you the space you wanted.  I'm sorry for all the times I let you down.  I'm sorry for not being your rock when you were always mine.  I'm sorry for forgetting the vow we took.  I'm sorry for not being the husband you deserved.  I'm sorry I lost your trust.  I'm sorry you're hurt.  Sorry for not getting up through the nights when our children wouldn't sleep.  I'm sorry I betrayed you.  I'm sorry I hurt you.  Most of all,  I'm sorry you're no longer mine. 

First Christmas without my children.  Second without a wife. 

They say times supposed to heal you,  but I ain't done much healing.

One of those nights

One of those nights where you really want someone to talk to but you realise...  There's no one there.  Im scared.  Scared of what the future holds.  Scared of where I'm going to end up.  Something has to change.  I just need that one chance...  Someone to say yeah...  Let's help him.  But right now I'm sinking.